It was dinner time!! I took out my steel plate similar to the one found in South Indian restaurants to serve a full meal. My hypothalamus released hormones that targeted the receptors in the liver. I was so hungry I could eat a horse. I ran.
Monday, reminded me of the veg menu on the calendar. Better to survive on cow’s food than die of starvation. Good old days back at home, where I used to have non veg food 7 days a week flashed through my mind. Two things I hate; waiting in queues, lay blame on me for something I have not done. It was a pretty long queue.
The member of staff serving at table struggled to serve the rice as sticky as a Gecko. The Aloo gobi masala was burnt like coal, daal was as viscous as H2O. The papad was as flexible as a Chinese gymnast, lemon pickle as bitter as a traitor’s kiss. In short, my life sucked at the ‘Kalluri’ hostel.
It cost me two drops of tears, and I was out of hostel. I used my papa’s debit card to withdraw the amount he had allocated to rent a house. I suffered from third degree tan searching for a double bedroom house within my budget. I still did not consult a broker.
Finally, I found my dream home. I was in fact thrilled to shift with two of my classmates. I sang, Cause Im as free as a bird now, and this bird youll never change.
And this bird you can not change. Lord knows, I cant change.
Lord help me, I cant change.
For some reason, my landlady was very caring and she never missed an opportunity to express her affection towards us. We were a bunch of losers who considered ourselves great for some reason mysterious even to us. So we had derived multiple theories around her fondness towards us. One was that she had found one among us as a groom for her daughter. Second, she did not want to return the deposit we had paid for the house. Third, she wanted us to get converted to join her church.
“Where is the rent Baba..”. I cannot tell you how exasperating it was when she called me BABA.. It sounded like I am a Sufi saint or a Hindu ascetic who was older than her great grandpa. There was not even a month when we paid the rent on time. We used to come home late night and jumped the gate to avoid her. It appeared that she was more concerned about us than collecting the rent. Our conduct did not change her approach. She still brought us fruits from her church on Sundays.
The safety and accessibility of drinking-water are major concerns throughout the world. We were also victims. We did not have money enough to buy 'Bisleri' and were too lazy to boil water. We raised this issue with our “mother”.
What baba!! You should have told me earlier.. I will give you drinking water everyday.. HAPPY??? Our overwhelming and Filmi gestures made her face glow with joy.. We giggled our hearts out!!
She kept her promise and provided us with water whenever we approached her. But there were days when we almost died of thirst. By the time we reached home, aunty would have slept. We had no other choice than waiting till the morning.. Still we did stick on to the rule that no one drinks water from the tap. After all, “It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.”
One year passed!!
Whosever room this is should be ashamed! At last, we saw a landlady in her. We protested; Our version was that ‘we are bachelors, we live it the bachelor’s way”. BARBARIANS!!! That’s WHAT YOU ARE!!! One more month and you’re gone.. She walked away..
We looked at each other as if the other one was blameworthy. We were thirsty again. We waited for sometime to make sure that we gave her enough time to bring down the wrath.
Aunty.. Water.. a melodious chorus.. Aunty came out.. She looked normal. What happened?, She asked.. Water, aunty.. Why don’t you use the tap?? She asked politely.. We need drinking water aunty, we were even more polite.. I couldn’t believe my ears.. I heard the most SHOCKING!! Words in my life..
SAME WATER BABA!!!…
